Star Words

Name, Name, Name!

adam waugh — Sat, 22 May 2010 18:21:53 +0000

Ok, Ok,,I remember my name! I have to write it down before I forget it! It is, my name is . . . Oh, oil change break!

Aah, that was so refreshing. Argh! I forgot my name . . . again!

- (annoyingly) unknown

I Write

adam waugh — Sun, 16 May 2010 12:44:05 +0000

Ugh, I finally learned to write in my weird book to write stuff in. By the way, I fired the other writer. Well, I ran out of slime-remover today. and my pass to Slug Fitness expired, so I’ll buy a new one when I get more slime-remover. I can’t wait to work out!

*(editor’s note: here there was a smudge of substance, supposedly slug slime, so we are unable to be sure what it said, but we assume it said Jabba.)

Weird Book to Write Stuff in

adam waugh — Sun, 16 May 2010 12:40:30 +0000

I was given a weird book to write stuff in. I told a guy to write things that I dictated. He probably can’t even spell Hut Hutt. It’s H-U-T-T. He’s probably so dumb he doesn’t even know I’m insulting him. Done. I DIDN’T MEAN FOR YOU TO WRITE THAT!! OR THAT!! Ugh, I wish you used a pencil. YOU CAN SIGN IT NOW!!

~Jabba the Hutt~

Frank’s Beliefs

adam waugh — Sat, 15 May 2010 22:38:51 +0000

I can’t believe this! Frank actually thinks there’s a real tooth trooper! Next thing you know he’s gonna believe in Santa Sith and who knows what next. Anyway, I have to act as tooth trooper for him.

-Vader

Movie Star

adam waugh — Sat, 15 May 2010 22:06:48 +0000

I’ve wanted to be a movie star since forever!!!!!!!!!! Wouldn’t it be fun to be in a movie?!!

-Princess Leia, the future movie star (longingly)

P.S.I like exclamation points!!!!!!!!

Tooth Trooper

adam waugh — Sat, 15 May 2010 21:59:25 +0000

Today I lost a tooth! It’s a good thing I lost it when my helmet was on because if the other troopers saw me they would make fun of me and say “Frank believes in the tooth trooper!” (which is true, and kind of embarrassing) Anyway, I can’t wait to put it under my pillow, wake up and find 6 packs of gun refills under my pillow ! (wouldn’t it be much more convenient if the tooth trooper put money under the pillows?)

-Frank

Not Much

adam waugh — Sat, 15 May 2010 21:41:20 +0000

Rebels attacked. They blew up Frank #2854′s cell.

One of our Starfighters got “shipwrecked.”

My armor got torn by a laser beam.

A typical day. I’m bored. yawn.

-Frank

MY neW HanD

adam waugh — Sat, 15 May 2010 21:27:30 +0000

mY NEw HanD iS goiNG crAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! uywerwGVHBNj,KJuDFFGjhghj HJijIOUGYTduTRUuIpPP[]JjkY858456323665565R67t678 WhaT woulD ObI WAn saY? (oH yeAH RIP.)

- LuKE

School

adam waugh — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 12:59:33 +0000

Well, today,is the last day till school. It’s going to be terrible OK unusual. To tell you the truth, I’m afraid of I’ve never been to school*. Well, time for regular news. It’ll keep my mind of of school. I borrowed SCHOOL Jimmy’s under suit, (I don’t think he’ll notice) SCHOOL and I lost my pencil box. AND I DON’T THINK I WILL USE MY DIARY DURING SCHOOL except for notes.

-Frank

*(editor’s note: Storm Troopers develop quicker physically than humans because they’re artificial. Frank was supposedly 5 years in age.)

The Repair

adam waugh — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 14:35:30 +0000

Don’t tell anyone, but I have a fear of the repair man!!!!!(it’s scary jus thinking about him!) he’s dirty from oil, he’s always wearing overalls, and even though he always gives me a new, cool paint job, his face frightens me to death!!!!!!(it at least shuts me down) But the worst part is C3PO is bringing me to him TODAY!!!!!!

-b b b e e e e e p b b b b l l o o o o b b a a a wh wh wh o o o o(R2-D2)